Category Archives: easter

A Time for Healing

Last night was my last shift at IKEA (formally known around here as the Big Blue Box).

I am now working only one job at Major Hospital, with regular hours and weekends off. I will get to experience this nifty thing people keep telling me about, ‘free time’. I’m also looking forward to another neat thing people have told me about, ‘sleep’.

I will really miss working there. The people are fun, the job wasn’t too awful, and stress levels were definately less (no one will die if you don’t get them a LACK table OMG right now).

But it came just in time. On Wednesday, I got back my lab results from the vampires bloodwork taken on Monday and my hematocrit and ferretin levels were sufficiently low for them to discuss transfusion. Which I talked them out of because 1) the US is in the middle of a blood shortage and b) transfusions suck.

Iron resistant anemia is full of fail (and flavor, but that’s another story).  

It takes 6-8 weeks for red blood cells to repopulate. That puts us to the end of May. I’m going to do my best to keep my arse on the couch (aided by the bone-deep exhaustion and shortness of breath which are hallmarks of iron-resistant anemia), which is 100,000% contrary to my Rural American Protestant Work Ethic.

In other news, it’s so wonderful to be seeing Bp. Lamb’s wee pudding face on all the blogs today. I adore that man, from the days he was my bish down in Dio.NorCal. LOVE!


Filed under easter, my life

What? Wait, WHAT?!

I couldn’t go because I wasn’t feeling well, and then my parents were in town for the Holy Days, and just… things got away from me. I haven’t been to prayer group in a while, either, but I’ve been following everyone else’s stories of what’s been going on.

It’s been rough.

And then, well, then everyone said that he was dead, and I just, gave up. Because dead is dead, you don’t come back.

And now, NOW you’re telling me he’s back? From the dead?

My first question is how much you’ve had to drink this morning.

It’s true? Really true? If it’s true, do you know what this means? It means everything else he said was true, too!

Well, WHAT ARE YOU STANDING HERE FOR?! Go! Go tell everyone!

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Filed under easter, meditations

Score: Illness 6, Mary Sue 0

In addition to the retracted eardrum, in addition to the major sinus infection, I have now lost my voice.

This sucks.

I didn’t go to MT services, I prolly won’t make it to GF either. What’s the point of going if I can’t sing?

This really sucks.

My parents are on their way over. Yesterday they came in with commentary on how I look, unpacked everything from my move five days ago and made value judements on it, and left me with a wagged-finger admonition to “start acting like an adult”.

I’m not sure exactly what that means.


Filed under easter, my life


Guess what guess what guess what!

Christ is Risen!


*is exhausted*

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Filed under easter, me being myself


Last Sunday, I was complaining. “Aw, it’s still purple. I hate purple. Lent is taking FOREVER!”

Today, we cleaned A Certain Church. And everything at the altar was red.

And I says to myself, I says, “NO! It can’t be Easter yet! I’m not ready yet! I haven’t done enough! Can we wait another week?”

One more week.
I’ll be ready then.
Really, I promise!

I’ll have my house in order. I’ll have prayed, I’ll have done charitable acts, I’ll be ready to welcome God’s Annointed, the Messiah. I’m not ready yet!

I ran about with other parishoners, cleaning madly. Clucking over gum in the pews, crayon marks, scuff marks, scrubbing at windows, hauling out ladders to get the high corners (and freaking out as the music director climbed a ladder with a shop vac to get the dust off of the rafters over the altar). We counted hymnals and prayerbooks and debated what to do with the ratty paperback Bibles in the racks and how exactly to repair the cracked pews up front.

It’s an old parish with not much in the way of financial gifts. At one point, we had to give up, say “That’s as good as we can get it.”

It makes me sad, and it annoys my perfectionist streak. We must have everything perfect! Get palm branches! Throw your coats on the floor so the King doesn’t have to walk on regular ol’ dirt!

I wonder who wasn’t at the parade, though. I wonder who was in their houses, cleaning furiously. Who missed out because they didn’t feel they were good enough, to soil the King with their presence. I wonder what they missed.

I wonder what I’ll miss, if I keep trying to be the perfect one.

Lift up your heads, O you gates;
be lifted up, you ancient doors,
that the King of Glory may come in.

Psalm 24:7

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Filed under easter, Lent, me being myself, meditations